How to Support a Loved One with an Eating Disorder around the Festive Season
For many, the festive season is a time of coming together, often centred around food, celebration, and shared traditions. But for someone living with an eating disorder, it can also be one of the most stressful and triggering times of the year.
If you have a loved one going through this, your support - especially during this season - can make a world of difference.
Why the Holidays Can Be Challenging
Holidays often revolve around food, family, and social expectations - all of which can feel overwhelming for someone with an eating disorder or disordered eating patterns. Common triggers include:
Pressure to eat in social settings
Comments about food, weight, or appearance
Disrupted routines and lack of privacy
Increased anxiety and emotional stress
It's important to remember that eating disorders are complex mental health conditions. They are not simply about food, and they don't go away just because it’s a “special occasion.”
How You Can Support Them
1. Avoid Comments About Food, Weight, or Appearance
Even well-meaning comments like “you look healthy”, “you look like you’ve lost weight” or “you’ve barely eaten” can be deeply triggering. Focus on how your loved one feels, not how they look or what they eat.
Instead of: “You look great - have you lost weight?”
Replace with: “It’s so good to see you. How have you been feeling lately?”
2. Respect Their Boundaries
Let them set their pace when it comes to meals, conversations, and social activities. Offer support without pressure.
If they need to eat separately or take breaks, that’s okay.
Let them know it’s safe to step away if they’re feeling overwhelmed.
3. Create a Safe and Supportive Environment
Help make the day feel less food-centric. Focus on non-food traditions, connection, and shared experiences.
Play a game, go for a walk, watch a movie together
Avoid diet talk or discussions about “earning” food
4. Check In—Without Focusing on the Eating Disorder
Ask how they’re doing in general, not just around food. A simple “How are you going today?” shows care without centring their illness.
5. Support Their Treatment Plan
If your loved one is working with a dietitian, therapist, or treatment team, respect their meal plan or routines, even if it doesn’t align with your expectations. Dietitians and clinicians often help create strategies to navigate tricky days like these.
Remember: Eating Disorders Don’t Have a ‘Look’
Your loved one may appear to be coping on the outside, but that doesn’t mean the internal struggle isn’t real. Eating disorders affect people of all sizes, genders, and backgrounds and everyone deserves compassion and support, especially during emotionally charged times like the holidays.
Using weight-neutral language and avoiding assumptions about someone’s body or behaviour helps create a safer space for recovery.
Final Thoughts
You don’t need to have all the answers, you just need to be there with empathy, patience, and a willingness to listen.
The festive season can be difficult, but it’s also an opportunity to remind your loved one that they are more than their eating disorder and that they are not alone.
When to Encourage Professional Help
If your loved one seems to be struggling more during this time, whether with food, isolation, or emotions, encourage them to reach out to a healthcare professional, or book in an appointment below with one of our dietitians. Dietitians trained in eating disorders can help manage food-related anxiety, create gentle structure, and work collaboratively with mental health support.